an inspirational performance tonight by the books. i need more music, more sounds, more performance. yes. its one of those experiences where i just feel deliriously happy and like i could almost just die right then. live instruments and electronics is the best combination from my viewpoint. yes.

okay, sooo, i have been trying to read this book for awhile- powers of horror by julia kristeva- it was recommended to me by anne-marie, and then i happened to read a little bit of it once somewhere and was quite taken by it- really felt like things she was talking about were very relevant to me, exactly some of the things i think sometimes. but now having been trying to read it for awhile. . . really, i never read philosophy- i know so little, so i have a super hard time with it. in alot of ways in reading it i sort of just have a gut feeling like i understand it, almost like sound. but then i can't explain it. so i keep going back and re-reading. . .lots of re-reading but i don't get very far. but i am determined to.

other things- getting people to communicate with me, open up is good right now. a few different cases of that and all are good. rick and me making noises is good. weather is sort of good, already getting to sweaty for me though. water is good. being alone in the house right now is good. i'm getting super into music again- both listening and playing is good. artwork in my studio is not so good but i hope to make it again good. copying off of rick is good. making plans to travel is good. music is the best good.


looking at old photos is good.
for some reason won't upload now i'll try again later.